The Chemistry of Tears: What Our Emotions Leave Behind
This weekend, tears came.
Not in a flood or a dramatic collapse. But slowly. Reluctantly. As hard as I tried to push them away - because that’s what I’ve trained myself to do- they welled up anyway. A few rolled down my face. Some stung. Some didn’t. But each one carried something I hadn’t planned on releasing: the weight of sadness I’ve outgrown but never fully grieved, the frustration of old patterns, the quiet ache of childhood wounds, and the voice inside me still asking “Am I safe to feel this?”
I challenged a literal fear of heights, but more than that, I challenged the deeper fear of feeling. Of facing myself. Of unlearning the belief that being strong means staying dry-eyed.
And as those tears fell, I was reminded: our tears are not just emotional - they’re biological. Crying is one of the most cathartic, intelligent things your body can do.
The Science Behind the Tears
There are three types of tears:
• Basal tears – The quiet MVPs. They keep our eyes lubricated, clean, and protected every single day.
• Reflex tears – The ones triggered by smoke, onions, or dust. They serve to defend and flush out irritants.
• Emotional tears – These are different. They’re alive. They’re sacred. They carry your story.
Emotional tears contain chemical messengers that aren’t found in the other two types. These include:
• Adrenocorticotropic hormone (ACTH): Related to cortisol and the stress response.
• Prolactin: A hormone involved in emotional regulation and stress adaptation.
• Leucine enkephalin: A natural endorphin that reduces pain and brings relief.
That means when you cry, your body is doing more than expressing, it’s processing. You’re quite literally releasing stress. Regulating emotions. Delivering your own internal pain relief.
That post-cry calm? That release you feel in your chest. That’s not imagined, it’s biology. Crying is your nervous system completing a loop and restoring balance.
Tears as Truth
So, when those tears crept down my cheek - uninvited, unplanned…..I knew something deeper was happening. I wasn’t breaking down. I was breaking open. UGGHH, I wasn’t happy!
Because behind those few tears were beliefs I’ve carried for years:
• “You have to do it alone.”
• “You’re not good enough.”
• “If you feel, you’ll fall apart.”
• “No one will catch you.”
• “Stay strong, stay quiet, stay in control.”
These old narratives may have protected us once, but they often become the walls of the box we live inside. We shrink ourselves to fit into the stories we’ve outgrown.
The Real Work
This is the real work:
To face ourselves.
To feel what we’ve buried.
To grieve what we never had.
To challenge what keeps us stuck.
To rewrite what we’ve been taught about being “strong.”
Every time we cry, climb, confront, or even question, we are reshaping who we are.
Our box? It’s just a story. And we are allowed to outgrow it.
What Lives on the Other Side
Let the tears sting. Let them roll. Let them teach you something.
Then wipe your face. Breathe deep. And rise.
Because freedom isn’t found in pretending everything’s fine….
Freedom lives in the moments we feel it all… and choose to move forward anyway.
Key Takeaways:
• Emotional tears carry stress hormones, mood regulators, and natural painkillers.
• Crying is a physiological process that helps us heal and release.
• Old beliefs about strength and emotional control often hold us back.
• Challenging those beliefs allows us to move from survival to expansion.
• Feeling deeply is not a weakness - it’s a gateway to freedom.
Ready to push past the stories that are keeping you stuck?
If you’re ready to challenge your inner critic, outgrow old narratives, and reconnect with your power - you’re not alone. I work with professionals, first responders, and high performers just like you who are learning how to live fully, feel deeply, and rise stronger.
Let’s break the box together.
Click here to learn more about working with me.
